Happy New Year? While we’re all hoping and praying that 2018 isn’t as much a colossal turd sandwich as 2017, many of us focus our attentions on bettering ourselves. Going to the gym, saving money, drinking less, not going to Jack in the Box twice a week for fried tacos, such and such, blah blah.
I just have one thing to say to that: Life is short, and there are incredible beers to be drunk! So give into your indulgences, give the finger to your New Year’s resolutions, and chug-a-lug-lug a few hearty, boozy, big-in-every-way beers. You’ve earned it. Maybe stop at Jack in the Box on the way.
Dogfish Head’s 120 Minute - I’ll find any excuse to put this big ass hoppy, big ass boozy, big ass assault of the senses kind of brew on any list. Coming out once a year, seemingly at random, with an even more mysterious ABV (reports say about 18% ABV), 120 Minute makes the term “extreme” a four-letter word. Bitter, sweet, and more akin to top-shelf liquor than craft beer, 120 is a surefire way to say sayonara to your resolutions.
Fremont’s B-Bomb - Are you lucky enough to have saved a bottle of this from last month? OPEN IT NOW. Don’t make me repeat myself.
Evil Twin’s Molotov Heavy - It’s 17.2% ABV, has 100 IBUs, it’s made by Evil Twin, and it tastes like hop gasoline. Yet when the overripe, caramelized, booze-soaked bitter grapefruit notes slam your palate like a battering ram, you don’t mind too much and just keep drinking till you can’t feel feelings.
Rodenbach Caractère Rouge - In my mind, only Rodenbach can make the finest red wines in the world taste like Kool-Aid by comparison. Caractère Rouge is their big daddy -- while it’s not as boozy as others in this list, it’s got cranberries, raspberries, sour cherries, and tastes like champagne soaked in sour juice soaked in god’s holy image. I really don’t love Sour beers, but I’d drink this every day of the week and feel like a Roman Caesar admiring his empire.
Some may be frustrated that I implore them to give up their resolutions, but let’s be honest -- how long were you gonna keep them up? Enjoy spoiling yourself with beers worthy of breaking the New Year’s pact.
Written by Ed Moore
Featured image from eviltwin.dk